My Third Novel's Conclusion, My Heartbreak

My heart begins to break when I think about completing this particular book -- because this narrative has sustained me like no other story I've known. It's both more personal and more universal than my other works. But beyond memory and archetype, it's a cri-de-coeur about needing to become the person one is destined to be. And in the writing, I have met my own life's work, my own fated journey -- having the sense all the while that the pages are suffused with a resonance, an energy, an electrified field that defies explanation. Writers hope and pray to be overtaken by a work in this way -- to be conscripted into passionate service of a profound story. To experience it even once in a lifetime seems a great privilege. I still have several months before this novel is complete, and this constitutes my reprieve. Because I'm not ready for the beauty to end.




Tuesday, March 28, 2023

Father/Son Basketball Game

OIG Hotline, my husband called me recently to confess that he purchased tickets for tonight's Warriors basketball game at Chase Center in San Francisco in order to take our younger son to this event.

Perhaps the faxes I re-sent earlier today will assist in mitigating the pressure Duncan has been experiencing from his wayward FBI handler.

No son should have to fear his FBI handler's demands that he lie about his own parent.

And no parent should be forced to endure those lies as a threat to his life and the lives of his family members.

Yet, the far right has forced many losses upon Americans, and these are only two of the many they have caused for our family.

Out of an abundance of caution, I have requested that my husband document this event in its entirety.

I hereby certify that the foregoing is true and correct.




Lane MacWilliams

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The FBI is a deeply divided agency.  There are many FBI employees who view their vows to the Constitution with the utmost seriousness and honors nd who strive to defend the fundamentals of our democracy with courage, fortitude and commitment.  The fact that some segments of the FBI appear to have embraced a lawless course is not a justification to assail the FBI in general.  As President Joseph R. Biden has so rightly expressed, violence is never justified in any circumstance.  The rule of law must always be honored and upheld.  It is our shared determination to preserve the civil liberties and human rights of all Americans that renders the United States a democracy.  We must never abandon this promise. All of our most cherished freedoms depend upon it.

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